Author Archives: hwdadmin

10 Ways My Son Drives Me Nuts…

But is too cute to yell at.

1.  Being a menace:
Throwing a very big, very dry and very clean towel into the tub while I’m bathing his sister.

2.  Being a jokester:
Finding the two back pockets on my jeans to grab on to while I try to clean up his spilled milk.

3.  Being an actor:
Uses his movie star looks and smile to lure me in and slap me in the face.

4.  Mocks Me:
Starts off his morning in tears and says he needs coffee.

5.  Challenges Me:
Steals my phone and calls my contacts. When I go grab the phone he throws it aimlessly in the air.

6. Plays With My Emotions:
Says he has to go potty, but really only wants me to read his favorite book to him, “The Hungry Bunny”.

7.  Disorganizes Me:
Ransacks my closet and walks past me in my black pumps.

8.  Confuses Me:
Will beg, cry and stomp to go outside, but refuses to put pants or sneakers on.

9.  Bosses Me Around:
Demands me to stop whatever I am doing to get his Mickey Mouse, but tells me to be careful as I go.

10.  Loves Me So Much…it hurts:
Goes to hug me, but head butts me in my lip. (It’s an accident…I think.)

 

 

10 Tips For Grandma When Talking To Grandchildren

Kids can learn many things from the special bond they form with their older, wiser and more mature grandparents. For example, how to bake the perfect cake, how to clean the right way in between your toes in the bath and how to save money from collecting coupons. However, even our most formal and conservative elders can forget the age gap between themselves and their grandchildren and sometimes may make a comment (or many) that gives little ones an advanced education in life, death and everything in between. Here are the top 10 comments Nana should think twice about saying in front of her impressionable grandkids.

1. When referring to the child’s mom and dad you should try to refrain from calling them nick names, like: Schmuck, stupid and putz.

2. When swearing in front of a minor you should always S-P-E-L-L the bad word. Not curse first and spell it second.

3. When your grandchild is telling you a story about one of his or her peers don’t shout out physical cues to refresh your memory about them. For example, “Oh the chubby one” or the “One that looks like an Old Man” or the “Five-year-old with the connecting eye-brows”.

4. Try to keep your humor within age appropriate limits. It’s probably not a good idea to make jokes like, “Your grandfather is worth more to me dead than alive.”

5. If your grandson misbehaves or purposely pushes your buttons you may want to reprimand him with words like, “There will be a consequence for your bad behavior” NOT “I am going to kill you.”

6. When whipping out photos and videos from your youth, stick to sharing the fun and crazy moments you shared with your friends. They don’t really need to know how many of them died from cancer or heart disease.

7.   Try to keep your competitive nature in check when playing cards or games with your grandkids. You don’t always have to talk smack so you can win.

8. When you are relaxing and watching TV with your grandchild, if a “Viewer Discretion Is Advised,” warning flashes on the screen it’s probably best to choose another show.

9. When playing with your granddaughter, remember you are supposed to be the responsible one. Teach her how to do fun, physical activities like how to use a hula-hoop around her waist, not her neck.

10. Don’t get down on your age. Instead of focusing on the number just keep reminding your kids no matter how old you are, you will always be the most fun, playful grandma they ever hung around with.

*Originally published for WEtv.com

Seven Names I Like To Call My Mother-In-Law…

Just like an ambiguous fine piece of art a mother-in-law is worth a thousand words. However the words applied vary based on circumstance, comfort level, situation and let’s just say lots of patience and a killer sense of humor.  When I think about my kids nanny, a.k.a their Grammy, a.k.a my husband’s doting mother a.k.a my “you’re lucky to have me” mother-in-law I would like to share a few words I tend to think about her.

The Rotator: On a bi-weekly basis, after I do the laundry, she reminds me to rotate the family’s underwear and socks to avoid wearing the same pair.

The Advisor: Fortunately and unfortunately her rigidity has become a household “bugger.” Through the years, she has attempted to outwit my family with her coy micro managing tactics. She believes stalking, texting, and throwing out the phrase “I strongly suggest” repetitively will help promote her agenda. We’re on to you mom!

The Committed Customer: She is so loyal to the products she uses that she likes to check in with customer service regularly.   She believes it is her duty to inform them when she is pleased or livid with their services. For example if her Wednesday latte is not as sweet as her Tuesday latte, she uses her speed dial to contact corporate!

The Protector: Only she has the right to call me a “Putz” or “Nuts” but she will take anyone down who criticizes my crazies.

The Inspector: If it wasn’t for her my fridge would be off an inch, my couch would be too close to the wall, and my husband would have less closet space.

The Peacemaker: She’s always right.

A Specialist at everything else: Thank goodness for all the years she has mastered watching the news, making random friends at stores and researching the internet because without her knowledge my daughter would have the wrong percentage of cotton sheets, my son would learn to pee upside down and my eyebrows would go unwaxed.

Crop Tops and Confidence

So…I think I have mommy dysmorphia.  Technically it’s not a real medical condition, but since my
4+ years of being a mom and staring at myself in the mirror on a daily basis, I think it’s pretty safe to say, I definitely have it. Mommy Dysmorphia (defined by me) is a mom who is critical of her appearance, body image or sexual attractiveness now that she has gone from bride to baby maker.  Other than being self conscious about the common flaws many women complain about: boobs, booty, aging, wrinkles and peach fuzz growing in areas that once used to be hairless, the major contributing factor that made me realize that I can no longer stay silent about this self-diagnosed disorder is the crop top comeback.
Celebrity mom Kim Kardashian has been photographed in several.   Yes, she looks beautiful.  I even applaud her for her bold and daring fashion choices, but I can’t stop obsessing whether I would confidently be able to bare my tummy in public now that I am a mom.  Although Kim K. is able to pull off the look and most agree that she is one hot mama, I still have my own reservations about the code of “clothes” conduct I choose to display for myself, and the ones I secretly wish I could flaunt.
Before I go on, there are two important statements I need to make so I don’t receive any negative feedback.  One, this is not a pity party blog where I am hoping readers will want to help me overcome my insecurities and two, I am not a hater of crop tops.
I’m simply just pointing out the simple truth that as women get older, married and start a family they overcome some of their immature “isms” but find with the pressures of their new everyday life they develop another set of insane and most likely false ones.

What flaw or trait makes you cringe since you’ve become a mom?  I would love to hear and let you know you are not the only one.

 

Top Toy Predictions

Moms always want to be ahead of the game when it comes to tracking down cool, creative and educational toys for their kids, but it’s not always the easiest task.  From finding the best blocks that will stimulate your baby’s brain to encouraging your second grader to use his thinking cap when building a top-secret spacecraft, one NJ toyshop helps ease the pressure moms put on themselves when selecting the perfect gizmo.

Margaret Spicer, the owner of Distinctive Toys in Fair Haven, NJ looks at three important features when buying products for her store, “We like toy companies that have won parents choice awards, have long play value, and quality.”
While witnessing the Rainbow Loom craze in full bloom, when asked what is the next big toy trend, Margaret’s answer was simple, “Girls will always love crafts and boys will always want the next cool outdoor game.”  Check out her best toy picks kicking off 2014:

Infant/Toddler Toys

Courtesy of ToySmith

Courtesy of ToySmith

Bristle Blocks from Toysmith
Puzzle Match Memory Game by Wowopolis
Deluxe Build a Road by International Playthings
Discovery Space Center by Hape (also their play kitchen and accessories)
Xylophone Roller by Janod (and their wooden play sets for tea and birthday)
Original Tonka Trucks in Steel by Reeves International

Preschool Age and Up

speedstax

Speed Stacks with Timer by Speed Stacks
Squishables by Squishable – Distinctive Toy’s Faves: The new pink owl and the blue or pink octopus.
Kinetic Sand by Waba Fun
Demolition Lab by SmartLab Toys
Craft Kits by either Alex or Creativity
Pulsar PowerBalls kit by Orb Factory
Plush Dogs by Douglas
Fastrack by Blue Orange Games
Zingo! Sight Words by Think Fun
Calico Critters by International Playthings

***A New Mom In Town’s Time-Saving Tip:  Buying a gift?  Leave the wrapping to the pros.  The boutique wraps presents perfectly for the occasion.

 

Get Your Laugh On

Have you ever just needed a time out?  Winter break might be over for the kids, but what about a little break for mom?  My son has ransacked my house, proudly I might add, with his little evil laugh and my daughter has called for me, “Mommy,” 367 times in the past 4 hours.  Today is a good day for a laugh and I know just where to get it.  Crack up with “Will & Grace,” all day long on WE tv and catch up with the cast, in an article I wrote, Will & Grace Where Are They Now. 

Enjoy the weekend.

The Award Goes To…

As award season approaches honoring the biggest and best talent in Hollywood, don’t you think there should be an award ceremony recognizing the most fascinating women you know in Motherwood?  From keeping their cool while their kid throws a tantrum in the middle of the mall to walking with her head up high after her pride and joy reveals all her dirty (and sometimes embarrassing) laundry to a neighbor, there are hundreds of categories moms should be celebrated for.  Here are 15 “MAMAwards” that should be handed out this year.

The Award Goes To…

1.  The mom who didn’t go gangster on a 5-yr-old boy who told her son he’s not cool enough to play with.

2.  The mom most likely to not cry when her toddler throws a remote control at her nose.

3.  The mom who agreed to let her son wear shorts in the winter and her daughter dress in clashing shades of pink for an entire month.

4.  The mom who doesn’t freak out when her son sticks his hand in the toilet and tries to grab his poop.

5.  The mom who cooks five different meals for her picky eaters.

6.  The mom who was determined to breastfeed and stuck to the challenge even with inverted nipples and low milk supply.

7.  The woman who proved to be a terrific mom regardless of her ability to breastfeed or not.

8.  The mom who kept a straight face after her daughter innocently and loudly pointed out a man’s big belly in a quiet theater.

9.  The mom who tells each of her children secretly they’re her favorite.

10.  The mom who rented Alvin and The Chipmunks 8 times in one day for $2.99 each just to keep her baby from crying.

11.  The mom who gave up “binge-watching” Homeland for The Wiggles.

12.  The absolutely understanding mom who keeps getting interrupted from her dinner to wipe her toddlers behind.

13.  The incredible super mom who didn’t crack when her baby cried for 6 hours straight in the middle of the night.

14.  The protective mom who didn’t lash out at her daughter’s teacher when she told her to “cut the cord.”

15.  The ultra calm mom who doesn’t curse her kids off under her breath.

 

Tiny Tales You Tell Your Kids To Get Out Of 5 Sticky Situations

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From mini fibs about Santa Claus to the Tooth Fairy, here’s a list of five unforeseen scenarios and the little white lies you hope your kids will fall for.

Scenario 1:  You are a stay-at-home mom and you just sat down to turn on the television to catch up with your entertainment news.  Your daughter asks you to cut out construction paper hearts with her for the 10th time today.  Instead of hurting her feelings by simply saying, “Absolutely not,” how about saying…

“Mommy has to do research about Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie’s upcoming wedding nuptials for the senior position she holds at her very important job.”

Scenario 2:  Your son brings home a bag of rocks and dirt from school.  When you ask him what it is, he says, “My artwork.”  Instead of throwing it directly in the trash and scarring him from creatively expressing himself ever again, how about telling him…

“Mommy is so proud of your talent that I can’t wait to show it to the garbage men.”

Scenario 3:  Your daughter refuses to go to bed because she is afraid a scary monster is going to come into her room in the middle of the night. Instead of telling her there is no such thing as monsters (she won’t believe you anyway), you might want to make her feel safe by revealing…

“That’s impossible!  Mommy and Daddy checked the box, NOT MY HOUSE, when the town passed out a permission slip asking if we allowed monster visitors.  Now go to sleep…sweetie.

Scenario 4:  Your son’s best buddy, “Stanley,” his stuffed bunny, sadly had a rough ride in the washing machine and is missing his left eye.  You’re afraid revealing the gory details to your son may be too disturbing so you read this note…

“Hey dude!  My mom hopped all the way over to your house and told me I had to come home for dinner tonight.  I promise to stay in touch.  Your best pal, Stanley.”  “PS…don’t forget to eat your carrots.”

Scenario 5:  Your daughter is misbehaving and you tell her if she doesn’t start acting like a good girl then there will be a consequence.  When she asks you what type of consequence, you tell her…

“Mommy arranged a brunch for you and Ursula, the sea witch from A Little Mermaid.” 

Haute Holiday Mommy Style

Block parties, happy hour hotspots and family festivities!  A New Mom In Town turned to a trendy boutique to help busy moms alter their everyday style to keep up with their hectic schedules and holiday soirees.  Megan Mosera, owner of Posch Boutique, tells us the three fashion staples that can take any mom from carpools to cocktails in an instant.

1.  Faux Leather Leggings

”Our faux leather leggings are a HUGE hit this holiday season. My clients love the comfort of a legging, while getting a high fashion look,” says Megan.  For casual day trips, pair the leggings with an oversized comfy graphic tee or cardigan.   At night, slip into a more fitted, feminine top and celebrate.  You just may be this year’s best dressed guest.

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2.  Pretty Accent Pieces

“The statement necklace is key,” says Megan.   Moms who run errands all day in a blouse, skinny jeans and flats can change their appearance from subtle to sexy when the sun goes down.  At night, add an eye-popping pendant, mini clutch and booties to your basic wardrobe and you’ll be ready to mingle with the party crowd.

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3.  Lace Isn’t Just For Late Night

“My clients are looking for clothes they can get multiple use out of.”  Megan refers to these items as investment pieces.  “I used to stock up more on basics.  Now when I’m doing my buying, it’s so important that every piece has character.”
Lace is a great example.  Hints of the pretty sheer fabric peeking out of a leather jacket adds edge to an everyday outfit.  Taking off the jacket at night and revealing more of the top gives a glamorous festive-fun look in the evening.

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Make Your No Stress-olutions

resolution

Here is a glance at my first draft of resolutions for 2014.
1.  Run a 20-mile marathon.
2.  Meditate.
3.  Cook a Barefoot Contessa inspired meal for my husband (he loves watching her create delicious dishes for Jeffrey).
4.  Don’t snap at my kids.
5.  Look 10 years younger.

As I jotted down my grand New Year’s goals, it all seemed very doable and realistic.  Then I asked myself a simple question, “Me…have you met me before?”
I never ran a marathon, the thought of lying in silence freaks me out, I am just getting comfortable scrambling eggs and I can’t follow directions on a map so discovering the fountain of youth can be problematic (unless someone knows the address so I can plug it into the GPS).  Suddenly, my new oaths sounded more child-like than life changing, so I decided to challenge myself.  If my kids were making resolutions, what advice would I give them?  At that point,  I turned my list of nonsense into momsense. I would advise my children that it’s very important to have goals and work hard to achieve them.  However, these goals need to be clear, realistic and accompanied by a well thought out strategy on how to approach and accomplish them.  They should work towards making small victories and then raise the bar after they complete their first set of objectives.
I decided to take my own tip. I wouldn’t set my kids up for failure so why would I do it to myself?  Here are my official revised resolutions:
1.  Run a 2-mile marathon.
2.  Research the importance of meditation.
3.  Whip up an AMAZING omelette (Hope-inspired).
4.  Have more patience with my kids.
5.  Invest in some anti-aging cream.

Wishing all moms a Happy, Healthy and Accomplished New Year.

xoxo – A New Mom In Town Staff