Monthly Archives: September 2018

Back To The Beach-Jersey Shore Style

On Labor Day, there are two different types of people resting at the beach. There are the somber tourists who look at their glass half empty.  They recognize this is their last summer shindig at the shore before they head home by bridge or tunnel.  And then there are the giddy locals who look at their glass half full and keep pouring their margaritas knowing their fun in the sun has just begun.  Now that visitors have left the scene and the locals have the Jersey Shore all to themselves, here’s what they plan on saying good morning and goodbye to all month long.

Hello: Taking a quaint family bike ride up and down Ocean Avenue.

Goodbye: Having to constantly break due to congested traffic, cat-calling, or fist-pumping club music.

Hello:  Finding peace and escaping the crowded sidewalk talk.

Goodbye: Constantly being reminded how bad our “Joisey” accent sounds to tourists outside the Garden State.

Hello: Time to exhale:

Goodbye: Sucking in your stomach.  You no longer have to fake a six pack since the change in weather will have you covering up.

Hello: Your take out order arrives on time.

Goodbye: To calling an hour ahead for food delivery and still getting it late and ice cold.

Hello: To free and open parking spaces.

Goodbye:  Driving around in circles and waiting for a spot to open up before the bars close for the night.

Hello:  Smell of fresh air

Goodbye: Sudden whiffs of strong scents like cologne, sweat, cigarette smoke, car gas and fake tanning lotion.

Hello:  Walking barefoot on the sand

Goodbye: Having to pay to get on to the public beach.

Hello: Trip to the ice cream store.

Goodbye: Waiting to order your favorite sundae and keeping your fingers crossed that your kid won’t drop their cone sending you back in the packed line out the door.

Hello:  Absolute anonymity on the beach.

Goodbye:  Sunbathing right next to an old obnoxious college friend you broke up with years ago who you were told moved to an island, but didn’t realize it was Staten Island.

Hello:  Reuniting with your neighbors.

Goodbye:  Picking up their mail for two months because they decided to get out of town and vacation somewhere more quiet.